It's been a month

And I'm still not really "into" blogging much. I'm trying to get back into it, I swear. I just get so busy that I forget to post. Or I just get so overwhelmed. So, let's try to see if I can collect my thoughts enough to form an update of sorts.


Sept 12-
My SIL treated us and the kids to a local skating rink. They had a BLAST!! They did need to use the guides, but it was so much fun! Anthony and I enjoyed it as well. We did laser tag as well, and it was amazing! Gianna got into it as well, even though she didn't hit anyone.

Sept 21-
We took the kids and the puppy to a park to enjoy one of the last nice days of the season. Running, jumping, slides, swings, monkey bars ... They played for HOURS!!

Sept 22-
I literally spent ALL day doing laundry and cleaning the playroom. I went through all of Gianna's toys and threw out broken ones, toys that were drawn on, and ones she no longer played with. I fixed her reading corner and put everything together neatly. When I say ALL day, I meant it. I started at about 10 in the morning and didn't finish until a little after 6.

Sept 23-
Gianna started school! She loved it! She claimed she was going to cry all day for me, but didn't cry once! We had a situation with the bus which caused us to be waiting outside from 7:15AM until 9:00 ... when I ended up driving her to school. There's a street in the next town over with the same name as ours, so that's where the bus went. We also had an incident with the monitor on the bus home. She wasn't very pleasant, and I brought it up with our Headstart family advocate.
We also had her 3 year well child check up this day. Her official 3 year old stats are 36" tall and 30.6 lbs! She did need one shot. She wasn't too happy with it. Especially since we weren't expecting it. It was quite the shock to her.

Sept 24-
Second day of school and the bus was late again. Went to the right house this time, but didn't come until 8:30. School starts at 8 for her. We also had yet another incident with the monitor. I spoke with our advocate about it once again.

Sept 29-
AJ lies all the time. Today, his lie was incredibly ridiculous and over nothing serious. He came home from school and all he did was eat, eat, eat. He is on quite a bit of medication, so I'm not surprised that he doesn't eat at school. After his 20 thousandth snack, I told him no more, as dinner was on it's way (pizza). He snuck in the kitchen and ate toast. When I asked him about it, he insisted it wasn't him. I honestly gave him no less than 15 chances to tell me the truth. He lied each and every time. I sent him to bed early that night because, even after FINALLY getting him to admit it, he lied once again. I had enough. Also, he started hitting himself when I punished him.

Sept 30-
I kept G home from school because she was complaining of a belly ache and pointing to where her spleen is. I would rather be safe and have her looked at, than be sorry and something be wrong that we missed. Doctor took her in, even with no open appointments, and looked her over. Said her spleen felt just fine, but ordered blood tests anyways, since haven't had any done recently and have no current numbers on file. Blood test came back the next day. Hemoglobin was 9.5 (previously 8.5), hematocrit up to 29 (previously 25)

We also had AJ's therapy appt this day. It was the absolute WORST visit ever. I got yelled at for being "late" (I was actually early). The therapist and I got into it, and I told her she was of no help to us. Because I told her that her "suggestions" weren't helping, and that they were already things we were doing, she called my husband into the room because I was being "irrational". She and I do not mesh well. She spends more of our appointment time on the phone with her grandkids, or talking to me about her grandkids. I'm sorry, but I don't care. Help my son. That's what we're there for.

We did end up changing some medication. Not his therapist ... the RN at the clinic we go to. He is now on 40 mg of Ritalin LA (down from 60), still on 4 mg of Risperidone, .10 mg of Kapvay, and now we have added .125 mg of Seraquol. I'm not seeing much of a change. I am going to be sad when we leave, because I like her, but hopefully the next therapist we see will have an equally amazing RN.

Oct 1-
Got Gianna a new Nirvana t-shirt from Target! We love it!

Oct 2-
My birthday. Met a friend at Friendlys with the kids and we had ice cream. I am still not thrilled about being 30, but it's not too bad ... so far.

Oct 3-
I take that back. Being 30 is HORRIBLE. I was in yet another car accident. Some woman reversed into me at the SAME time I was reversing. I was 3/4 out of my spot when she hit me. It was entirely her fault, but I didn't feel like filing yet another claim this year. I did file a police report though, just to cover my bases. My car is scratched, the paint is peeling, I should have filed a claim so it could be repaired.

Oct 4-
Watched Annabelle with my husband for my birthday. Creepy!! It was REALLY good though!!

Oct 7-
Kids FINALLY have their Halloween costumes. Can't wait for Halloween!

Oct 11-
We took the kids to a local Pumpkin Farm. They had a blast!!

Today-
I think Gianna has Pink Eye. Going to take her to the walk in, and then get them ready for bed. It's been a LONG day today. (Now that I'm home, YES, she does have pink eye. No school for tomorrow. 1 drop every 6 hours in her eye until it's clear. Booooo)



Hopefully, I'll keep up with blogging!! I miss it! And if you're wondering, I have decided to file the claim against the woman who hit me. As most of you know, I am VERY much into car seat safety. Despite a minor accident like this, the manuals in my kids' car seats state that they need to be replaced. That is what I intend to do, so I will be pursuing the claim.

Happy THIRD Birthday, Gianna!!

Wow. I cannot believe my baby is THREE YEARS OLD now!! THREE!! Where has time gone? 

From my teeny tiny 5 pound 7 ounce, 18.5 inch long, badly jaundiced newborn:

To my chunky 21 pound 4 ounce, 27 inch long one year old: 

To my independent 27 pound, 33.5 inches tall two year old:

And now my (unofficially) 31 pound 8 ounce, 35 inches tall three year old:

She has come a longggggg way. She can count to 10 (and sometimes higher) with assistance. She knows her ABC's and loves to sing them with her BFF Anna. She loves the Frozen movie, and we spent quite some time watching it 5 times a day! We are currently down to once every week, if that. She loves to color with crayons and markers. She is fully potty trained during the day (has been since 18 months old), and we are currently night training her. She will be starting her first year at Head Start this September! We are very excited!! Oh, she also has mastered the scissors quite effectively. See??

I woke up to ^^that^^ right next to me in my bed. And the following on the floor:

This is our end result. Those little ringlets you see on floor in the previous pic came from each side, and those long locks I woke up next to are from the front. She has a baby mullet. 

I seriously spent 20 minutes crying over it Thursday morning. I was sick to my stomach over it. I put the scissors away, and even covered them, just in case. Gianna is more determined than my other 2 combined. She knew I was unhappy and didn't make a sound while I bathed her after discovering her new hairstyle. She didn't whine when it was time to come out. She didn't cry, but she didn't smile either. I genuinely think she understood I was upset. We did get it fixed today, so it looks better. Of course, there is nothing we can do about the mullet in the front, because it's so incredibly short, but at least the rest of her hair is even with the sides. 

Gianna definitely gives us a run for our money, and keeps us on our toes, but we wouldn't change it for a bit. She is healthy, happy, and brings us great joy. She is finally sleeping through the night (in her own bed even!) and she has weaned a little over a month ago. Roughly the same time she started sleeping through the night! Oh, and she is still rear facing in the car with no plans to turn around any time soon. Yay ERF! It has been an awesome 36 months thus far. I can't wait to see what the next hold for us! Though, I could do without the scissors. I don't think her clothes appreciate it much, either.

Happy Birthday, Captain Destructo! We love you so much!!

Munchables Chewable Jewelry **REVIEW & GIVEAWAY!!**

I received this product in exchange for a review. All opinions are 100% my own.

As a mother to a kiddo with Sensory Processing Disorder, I know how important it is to have things on hand that my child can chew on. Preferably, something other than his fingers and clothing. AJ will chew on his fingers until they bleed, and he puts holes in his clothes. Neither of those are things I want him to do. Clothing isn't cheap, and as for his fingers? It hurts! Enter Munchables.

Munchables is a WAHM company, located in Canada. This mom set out to provide affordable teething jewelry for moms, that is aesthetically pleasing. But, she not only offers necklaces for mom. She also offers pacifier clips, bracelets, and even children's jewelry. We received a necklace for my son for review purposes.

I messaged Munchables, and soon Laura and I were in discussion for the perfect necklace for AJ. I told her what colors he liked, and she came up with this beauty.

These beads are food-based silicone, dishwasher safe, BPA free, and exceed safety standards. The clasp is designed to snap open in an instant so as to avoid choking risks. The beads can certainly take a lot of chewing, and hold up fabulously. As soon as it came in the mail, it was in AJ's mouth. And there it stayed for the majority of the day. While was chewing, he said it was a weird, but pleasant feeling. It didn't hurt his teeth, like chewing on his shirts sometimes did. He wasn't harming himself, like he did while chewing his fingers. I didn't have to worry about germs getting into his mouth, like I do when he gnaws on other items. Because this necklace doesn't touch the floor, it stays relatively clean. Since I don't own a dishwasher, I hand wash it every so often. Just a quick wipe down with a soapy hand gets the job done.

There are a TON of different beads to chose from, styles, lengths, designs, etc! The possibilities are ENDLESS!! The best part of this company, in my opinion, is the excellent customer service. Laura is so kind and easy going! I am VERY indecisive, and couldn't decide on how I wanted his necklace to look. As I said above, all I did was tell her the colors he liked, and she put together his necklace. It may be simple, but it's perfect for my boy. A big bonus is that they replace the clasp for FREE for the first year of ownership! AJ has a habit of chewing the clasp, and I have to remind him often that it's not made for chewing, but so far we have no issues with it opening and closing.

Added these pics 8.18 as I failed to do so earlier. As you can see, only the clasp has any signs of wear and tear after being heavily chewed on for over a month.

If you have a teething baby, or a child with SPD, please consider Munchables!! You won't be disappointed! One lucky reader will win a Munchables item of THEIR choice! All you have to do is enter using the Rafflecopter form below! Good luck!


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I sold my son to the Circus

No, not really. Although sometimes, I wish I could! Unfortunately, the circus isn't taking any new people, though.

AJ has been acting even worse than ever. Once school ended, he just wasn't happy. He's been miserable, mean, and actually physically hurting people on purpose. Specifically, he was targeting Gianna because she's smaller than him. He would pinch her when he didn't think anyone was looking, smack her, etc. Just the other day, I caught him pushing her off the chair. It's gotten out of hand. I brought in the big guns for his most recent appointment with his therapist. I scheduled it so that my husband could join me. I needed the support.

While our concerns weren't ENTIRELY addressed to our expectations, it did go better than if I had gone alone. AJ's medication was increased, so we are giving that a whirl. He is now on 40mg Ritalin LA and 2mg Risperidone in the AM, and 20mg Ritalin LA, 2mg Risperidone, and .25mg Clonidine between 1 and 3:30 PM.

It took a week before we could try this combination out. Only because our son is the only one in his area on Ritalin, apparently, and NO pharmacy had them in stock. They had to order them. So, we went a full week with NO medication at all. That was fun ... not. He was mean, hurtful, rude, impatient, violent, and so on. His words were hurtful, and he made me really wish I could sell him to a circus. Or even just give him away!

We have since tried the new dosage, and I'm still not seeing a huge difference. He's still argumentative, mean, violent, and just can't. sit. still.

However, we may have found something to help him. We've noticed that he's the only one in the house without an electronic device of his own, and he seems to have a hard time with that. He's constantly stealing Gianna's Kindle, or just snatching it out of her hands. Anthony and I have talked about this briefly before, and the agreement was that AJ had to prove to us that he could treat a tablet properly- no throwing toys, slamming them into the wall, floor, etc. Personally, I don't think his behavior warranted a tablet. He did not show that he could be responsible, as he has broken a few more toys this past week. But at this point, I'm desperate for some peace and quiet from him, some sense of normalcy, even though our life is anything BUT normal!

This poor little guy was seen Friday afternoon because of his eye. Turns out, he has a sty.

Fortunately for him, my laptop quit working. What that meant was, I needed a new laptop ASAP. I headed to our local rent-to-own store, and rented a computer. Long story short, I found a better deal with a laptop + tablet combo, so I took the original rental back. Since everyone else has their own electronic device, AJ will be using the tablet. He spent a whole half hour wrapped up on it. He put it down when I asked him to, and was actually polite when speaking to me and his sisters. He's like a different child. I'm not sure if his acting out was because of jealousy, or if the tablet is just a brain-suck and this is just a zombie of a child, too wrapped up in the tablet to notice his surroundings. This is only the first day he's actually had it, so I guess we'll find out soon enough.

Being without a computer was hard- I am VERY behind in some reviews that I needed to get. I find myself being committed to many reviews, when that is not the original purpose of this blog. I will be taking a massive step back to get this blog back on the track I originally had for it. I intend to post more about my children, namely my son, and how our lives are constantly on the go. And who knows? Maybe I'll stop seeking out a zoo to sell my kid to.

Surprise Ride Subscription *GIVEAWAY*

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“The idea for Surprise Ride came when we, sisters and aunts of two active and curious boys, struggled to find unique gifts that would add value to our nephews’ lives. Having experienced tremendous economic hardship during our own childhood, we remembered a simpler time when what we enjoyed most as kids was getting immersed in activities with siblings and parents. We were fortunate to have a dad who was an artist by profession and facilitated DIY activities. He always encouraged us to bring our imaginations to life. Those projects shaped who we are and our view of the world. We want to help busy parents give their kids that same opportunity to evolve through play. Surprise Ride was born from the desire to have a lasting impact on the lives of children, beyond the latest toy or video game.”

You can discover more about this amazing subscription box service in Miss Frugal Mommy’s review!

Now for the exciting part! One lucky fan is going to win a 1 month subscription to Surprise Ride.  This giveaway is open to US residents 18 and older. Enter to win in the giveaway tools below, all entries will be verified, one entrant per household or you will immediately be disqualified. Winner will be contacted via email and has 48 hours to respond before a new winner is chosen. Prize fulfillment is the responsibility of the sponsor and not the participating bloggers. Good Luck!!!

Entry-Form

Family fun! *pic heavy!*

About 3 weeks ago, I was incredibly sick. I had the stomach bug so bad, and was reduced to nothing but tears and zapped of all energy. My house was a wreck, my kids hadn't had an actual cooked meal, and I hadn't been able to stand up for more than a few minutes without falling over due to being incredibly weak and dizzy. I am sure I was severely dehydrated, which certainly didn't help me any.

After I recovered, I decided that we needed to get out on the first nice day. I needed some fresh air, and the kids didn't want to be cooped up inside on an almost 80° day. So, Saturday morning I decided that we were going to go to the Zoo. Because I was angry with my husband, I was not inviting him to attend our outing. Gianna had other plans. She walked up the stairs and asked daddy to come "Daddy! Come to the zoo with us?" He also wasn't feeling well, so I figured he wouldn't be up to the trip. The Zoo isn't far from us at all, but with the kids, it can become an all day thing. He decided to come. So much for that.

We arrived at about 12:50, went through the gates, and started our visit. Sheep, goats, ring tailed lemurs, and this cute little guy. The red panda. My new favorite animal. He's so cute!!!

By the time we passed the cougar, the birds (bald eagles, vultures, owls, etc), and the arctic fox, my husband was really starting to feel worn down and sick. We stopped at the snack shack and got some drinks and pretzels. At that point, he decided he was going to head back to the car and wait for us there. It was 1:30. He didn't think we'd be that long. The Zoo isn't large by any means, but it certainly isn't small. There were still quite a bit of animals left to see, and some of them are rather entertaining.

We went up to the Large Cats of Asia building, which houses a leopard and two gorgeous tiger sisters. The leopard kept walking back and forth in front of the windows, before deciding that she was tired and just wanted to lay in the sun. 

After that, we visited a spectacled bear and then made our way up to my favorite exhibits- the otters and the penguins. The penguins apparently only go in the water once in a great while, so we were incredibly lucky to watch them jump in and swim around. We went into the building so that we could see them underwater. Gianna was so excited to watch them swim! They played with her, through the glass, for at least 10 minutes.

 On one of our bathroom breaks, the kids decided to play with the statue outside.

After that, we checked out the wolf exhibit. We didn't see any while we were inside the building, but I decided to prop my phone up and set the timer so I could get a picture of the kids and I together. I wish it wasn't so dark, but I really like it other than that.

While we were leaving, we spotted the wolves outside of the large area. There were 4 of them, but only one was actually out in the open enough for me to get a picture of him.

After this, we made our way back to the beginning so that the kids could spend some time feeding the goats and sheep again. They really enjoy that part the most. There were 3 new babies, and they were just the cutest little things hopping around! Gianna loved watching the one play. The mother to the twin babies was incredibly loud. Every time AJ would look at her, she'd "BAAAAA" as loud as she could. Guess it was feeding time and she was making sure the zookeepers knew she was there and waiting!

Before we left, we hit up the ZOOvenir shop to pick up some souvenirs for the kiddos. AJ picked some plastic zoo animals, Sofia bought a ring, and Gianna wanted this tiger named Tirney. I put it on her back and used a rubber band around his hands and feet to keep it in place. She loved it!

And, the perfect ending to the perfect day? ICE CREAM from Coldstone!

My new favorite picture of Gianna:

They had a blast. We spent a total of 3.5 hours at the zoo. The kids had a blast, I had a blast. My husband sat in the car that whole time. I'm sure he was hoping that he didn't come, or that we would hurry up. Oh well. We had fun, and that's all that matters. My kids enjoyed themselves and the attention they received. It was one of the best times I've had in a while and I can't wait until the weather warms up some more so that we can do more things like this. I'm hoping to hit up the Syracuse Zoo and the mall as well. I know the kids would enjoy that just as much, if not more, than this zoo.

A visit from CPS??

My apologies for not blogging recently. I truly appreciate all of the emails and FB messages from fans who were worried that something was wrong. Truth is, a lot was wrong. I struggled with writing this, as this is something that is VERY personal. But, I figured I'd get it out.

A few months back, I took custody of 3 of my cousins. Because there was an active ACS (Administration for Children's Services) case in NYC, I assumed that when CPS came knocking on my door that it was a case transfer. I had no reason to believe otherwise, and our worker was very nice. He explained to me that he was just here to check up on the kids, and make sure they were receiving the care necessary. G was enrolled in school, all three had their first check up with a new doctor, they had their own sleeping space, clean weather-appropriate clothes, plenty of food, no concerns from him.

The first visit from him was back in late November. Which is what made me believe that it was a transfer from the ACS case. He gave no impressions that it wasn't. He came, explained that he was here to check on the girls, and we spoke a bit about the situation. Because we were still adjusting to a family of 8 instead of 5, life was a bit hectic. I still had the girls' clothes in the foyer because I was trying to find a dresser or another thing to keep their clothes in. Not only that, but there were toys and books all over. We had an appointment, so in order to make it on time, we rushed out and left the toys and books all over the place. When we returned, our worker was here waiting for us.

Of course, since we left without picking up the mess, I knew what was waiting on the other side of the door. I did tell D, our worker, about the mess. He said nothing as we went into the house. He took a look around. I took him into the kitchen to show him the fridge and cabinets that were full. We went up to the room where the girls were sleeping in so that he could see that they did have a bed. We went into my oldest daughter's room so he could see where my kids were sleeping (Gianna in her crib, Sofia in her bed, AJ on his mattress on the side of Sofia's bed). I showed him the bathroom where the toilet was clean, toilet paper was stocked, and we had plenty of shampoo, conditioner, and body wash, along with toothbrushes and toothpaste. We came back downstairs to the living room, playroom, and foyer. We discussed the toys and books around, and talked about what I could put the girls' clothes in. His conclusion? Nothing out of the ordinary, but because the girls are new to me, he would come by and visit while the case was still open. Sure, not a problem.

Fast forward a few months. Tuesday, March 4th- Apparently, while I was out and about taking care of things, D came by for a visit. He left his card in the door and had wrote what time he came and asked me to call. I called him as soon as I got the card (6pm, even though I knew the office was closed). I left a message, but I didn't receive a call back the rest of the week. I did call him a few more times just in case he was still waiting for me to call him. Monday, March 10th, I finally got a phone call from him. He apologized for not getting back to me as he was out of the office, but wanted to set up another visit. Sure, not a problem. We scheduled it for that same day, once the kids were home.

Shortly after the kids came home, D came over. I let him in, and we did the same ol' routine- check the fridge, cabinets, bedrooms, bathroom, living room, play room. After that, we stood in the foyer and chatted. It was only at that time that I found out this was not a transfer case. I was asking D for help in getting G into therapy. Since ACS mandated it in NYC, and I have custody, I have been trying to call the mental health clinic to get her in. They never return my calls. I told D about this, and asked if he could help me. He asked if I called ACS to ask for their help. I told him I did, but they said that they transferred the case up here and I needed to speak with our local worker, so I was asking him for assistance. He informed me that he was unaware of the case being transferred. I said to him "So, this is a transfer case? Someone called on me??" and he replied "Well, I'm not a long term caseworker. I am a 'someone reported you so I need to investigate' worker."

Hmm, well, that changes a LOT of things. At that point, I knew what had happened. And I know EXACTLY who it was who called. I turned to my husband and said "Well, that explains a lot. I should have known." D asked if I had problems with someone. I told him about this person who called, told him about the FB messages she sent me, and the jealousy I'm sure she is feeling which is what prompted the calls. I read a few of the messages to him and told him why I suspected her. Unfortunately, he couldn't tell me who it was anyways, as he isn't allowed to, but he didn't have to. The look on his face said more than enough.

So, I guess the only thing left to do is thank the person who called. Yeah, you read that right. I can only say "Thank you" to her. Why? Because D has a HUGE role in helping the courts determine who should have custody of the girls. Because YOU decided to call on me, with ridiculous claims, the court ordered custody should be finished faster than without it. Because YOU decided to call on me, I don't have to worry about whether I'm not providing or doing enough for them. You have also opened up a whole world of assistance for me. Even though he is closing the case as "unfounded", when I need help with services for these girls, I am able to call and D will do what he can to make it easier. Why did I not think of calling myself!?

Oh, and P.S.- It's NOT "child abuse" to still nurse your 2.5 year old. Nor is it abusive to keep said 2.5 year old rear facing, or the 7 year old in a 5 point harnessed car seat. But thanks for your concern!!

Shame On Me

As I've stated before, my daughter receives donated breast milk. It helps to keep her healthy, and since she doesn't eat a lot of solid foods still, it gives her the nutrition she needs. Her doctor knows her eating habits, and actually encourages us to keep seeking donor milk. I am running EXTREMELY low on our freezer stash, and put a status on my FB asking my friends and family to keep an eye out if they happen to know someone who has extra and would like to donate it.

I have always struggled with low supply. But we managed to make it to almost a year old. A few weeks before she turned one, I had to have a few moles removed. Two of them were on my back. I knew it was going to be hard to hold her comfortably so that she could nurse. I mentioned the thought of looking to see if anyone had any extra milk to tide her over for a few feedings for a few days (I planned to nurse, then give her the bottle when it started to hurt). Anthony was not on board. He said to just give her formula when she needed to eat. Since we had a few samples from Enfamil, I made her a bottle right then and there to see how she would do. She took one suck off the bottle, and spit it right out immediately after. Then she threw the bottle at me. Clearly, she was not interested in it. Anthony saw, but still wasn't comfortable. It took a few days of convincing him it was for the best. Why is it acceptable to give her formula that was made from cows milk in a factory, cows that we don't even know how they're treated, what they eat, how the farmer handles them, if the machines are clean, etc. I can talk to the mother who is donating milk to us, and even request a blood test to ensure that she is healthy. He agreed that it was better, and so I began the hunt.

Fortunately, I was able to find milk with no problems. I met with a few different women, and had my freezer fully stocked in the event that something should go wrong and I wouldn't be able to nurse her myself. Fortunately, that wasn't the case. But, starting her on donor milk was the best thing that I have ever done for her. She immediately went from the 3rd percentile in height/weight, all the way up to the 85th. Her immune system was much better. Instead of being ill 3 weeks out of every month, she was ill once. She faced the possibility of another blood transfusion while ill. I gave her more donor milk, and her numbers shot up immensely. So much so, that she didn't need the transfusion. She has never been healthier since giving her donor milk.

To this day, we are still using donor milk. I plan to continue until she is at least 2 years old. I do still nurse her as well. We go through about 8-12 oz of donor milk a day. Like I said earlier, I had posted on Facebook that I was in need of more, and for my family and friends to please let me know if they know someone who is looking to donate some. While I was out with Gianna at Walmart filling AJ's new prescription for his ADHD, my phone buzzed. When I looked at it, I saw that it was a FB message. I brushed it off because I was busy, and I could wait until I got home to deal with Facebook. But something about the first few lines that showed up in the preview really bothered me. After a few minutes, I couldn't take it any longer, so I opened it. This is what it said:

A few things didn't sit right with me about this message. First off, my daughter is only 21 months old. She's not even two yet. So, where she came up with three is lost to me. Second, she is NOT underweight by any means at all. She is 26 lbs. The WHO growth chart puts her in the 75th percentile. Again, she is not underweight. Third, her baby isn't that much younger than Gianna, from what a friend of mine told me. This friend knows her personally, as they used to be friends. Fourth, I'm not sure where she gets the idea that my baby doesn't need it. Pediasure will not help her immune system. It won't help her numbers to remain at a healthy level.  And last, she blocked me IMMEDIATELY after sending this, so I couldn't even reply back to her. 

I'm not sure why she thought it was okay to message that to me? I am a mother of a child with a blood disorder. I am doing everything that I can to ensure my daughter is healthy. I don't take milk out from underneath other babies. As a matter of fact, I informed this mother of 2 other moms who had milk to donate and gave her their contact information so that her daughter would have milk. All I am is a mother who is doing her best to keep her child healthy. Not selfish by any means. She may have tried to shame me, and guilt trip me, but I will not stand for it. 

For the time being, I am still on the hunt for milk. I'm not having much luck locally, though. I did have a mom willing to pump and ship to me, but we can't afford the shipping costs right now. If you happen to know of anyone who has milk they're looking to donate, please point them my way! Maybe one of them are close enough that we could work something out. 

Cry It Out??

In one of the many mom groups I'm in, one of the moms had posted that her baby doesn't sleep through the night (STTN). She just wanted to commiserate with other moms who know what it's like to be up at all hours of the night because baby still doesn't STTN. What she had said was that she just wanted to know that she wasn't the only one. Well, instead of people commenting and saying things like "They're only little once!" or "He'll sleep through the night eventually!", they were insisting that she needed to do CIO on the baby. A baby who is only 5 months old. Yep, you read that right. FIVE months old. 

One of the commenters had this to say:
So let me ask u this.... 1. Is he waking up to eat? 2. He is 6 months is he a healthy weight? 3. Have u tried sleep training? I was so tired and back to work I needed my baby to sleep. I use to nurse at 8 pm them 12am then 4am then 6 am. At 4 months wegot rid if the 2 am feeding. Sleep training 3 days if crying and a few hard nites for me. Then at 6 months we got rid if the 12 am feeding. Then he slept from 8pm to 4am. Then back to sleep. Have u tried anything like this? Every baby is so different but I couldn't give in.... I couldn't afford being up all nite. Good luck mama!

Remember, this baby is only 5 months old. The mom wrote this in response:
At next dr appt we are discussing sleep training. He's waking up to eat- not to snuggle. He houses the boobies! To all you moms out there that work and do this at night- you're my hero. Thanks for the sleep training tips.

Now, I don't know about you, but if my baby was waking up to eat, I sure as hell wouldn't be denying them food. This is a genuine case of the baby being hungry, as mom admits. I couldn't stay silent any longer, and I posted this:
 I guess I'm going to be the "bad guy" here to say this. But, babies should not be forced to STTN until they are ready. My daughter is almost 20 months old, and STILL does not sleep through the night. They will not STTN until they are ready. Cereal before bed won't help. Again, they will when they are ready. "Sleep training" is honestly nothing more than teaching your babies that you will not be there for them. The reason it feels so wrong when you subject them to it is because it's not natural. It goes against everything we are supposed to do, and that's to comfort them. They don't cry to be manipulative. They cry because they need something. Whether it's nutrition, or comfort. 
PLEASE read these links before deciding to CIO.
http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/fussy-baby/7-things-parents-should-know-about-babys-cries
and
http://mybrownbaby.com/2011/12/cry-it-out-the-method-that-kills-baby-brain-cells/

It definitely made me the bad guy because people left and right were bashing me for stating the truth. CIO is dangerous. It is terrible. Your baby cries and cries for you, and you ignore them. You are telling your baby that you don't care about them. That their needs aren't important. That you don't want to be bothered by them. And to me, it's irresponsible parenting. When you chose to have kids, you chose to sacrifice things- sleep being #1. If you are REALLY that tired, then you can hire a babysitter to watch your kid while you take a nap. Or ask your parents, in laws, siblings, or even your significant other.

What bothered me the most, is this screen shot I'm about to share. Whether you are pro-CIO or against it like I am, you can't read that and actually think it's okay. Remember, this baby is only FIVE months old.

Seriously?! Who puts in ear plugs AND turns the monitor off?! A friend and I were saying that she might as well have gone to a hotel. At least then, she would have gotten better sleep. She wouldn't have to worry about the ear plugs falling out. What really gets me is, what if something was GENUINELY wrong with the baby?  What if he got his leg stuck in the crib slat? What if he threw up and inhaled it? What if someone broke in? A fire started? Anything?! I can only hope that while she was being selfish, and ignoring that poor baby, that her husband went in there and consoled him.

I posted this picture on my personal wall, and on my FB page as well. I wanted to get reactions from parents to see what they think. I asked a friend to post on her page also. Almost everyone agreed that this was irresponsible and selfish. Another friend asked if she could post on her page. The comments she received surprised me. Some of them thought it was perfectly fine! I am just not sure I could ever agree with it.

I am well aware that we all have different parenting styles. I am well aware that what works for me may not work for you, and vice versa. And I try not to judge those who do things differently than I do. But some things that people do are just downright dangerous. I try to educate those around me about things I learned. I  welcome new information with open arms. I always strive to improve my parenting so that I can raise my kids to be successful, productive members of our society. When I see things that are dangerous, I feel the obligation to inform so that the parents/caretakers can take the measures necessary to improve the situation. I know, in a situation as such, this is something that a mandated reporter would HAVE to report. I'm sure people in the group are mandated reporters, and I am 100% sure that none of them reported her. As a matter of fact, everyone who commented after her congratulated her for making it through the night. I wonder how it would have went, if something tragic happened? Would people still congratulate her for getting her precious sleep? Would they congratulate her for not caving in, regardless?


Personally, I have done a modified CIO with my older 2. I never let them cry for longer than 10 minutes, max. But I did try to have my kids self soothe. It just didn't work, no matter how hard I tried. No matter how often we went through this at night. They never just laid down and went to sleep. Not until they were ready. It was like a switch. I can't recall their exact ages when they STTN, but they were a bit older than one. For the record, I did not attempt any modified CIO until they were closer to one. I would never do it to a baby younger than 10 months, and even then, it really depends on the baby. However, ear plugs in and monitor off? Not a chance.

I would love for your input on his. Leave a comment and let me know if you agree with CIO. Why or why not? Have you ever done it? How did it make you feel? Would you ever do it again?