Showing posts with label strippers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label strippers. Show all posts

Saturday, June 8, 2013

Shame On Me

As I've stated before, my daughter receives donated breast milk. It helps to keep her healthy, and since she doesn't eat a lot of solid foods still, it gives her the nutrition she needs. Her doctor knows her eating habits, and actually encourages us to keep seeking donor milk. I am running EXTREMELY low on our freezer stash, and put a status on my FB asking my friends and family to keep an eye out if they happen to know someone who has extra and would like to donate it.

I have always struggled with low supply. But we managed to make it to almost a year old. A few weeks before she turned one, I had to have a few moles removed. Two of them were on my back. I knew it was going to be hard to hold her comfortably so that she could nurse. I mentioned the thought of looking to see if anyone had any extra milk to tide her over for a few feedings for a few days (I planned to nurse, then give her the bottle when it started to hurt). Anthony was not on board. He said to just give her formula when she needed to eat. Since we had a few samples from Enfamil, I made her a bottle right then and there to see how she would do. She took one suck off the bottle, and spit it right out immediately after. Then she threw the bottle at me. Clearly, she was not interested in it. Anthony saw, but still wasn't comfortable. It took a few days of convincing him it was for the best. Why is it acceptable to give her formula that was made from cows milk in a factory, cows that we don't even know how they're treated, what they eat, how the farmer handles them, if the machines are clean, etc. I can talk to the mother who is donating milk to us, and even request a blood test to ensure that she is healthy. He agreed that it was better, and so I began the hunt.

Fortunately, I was able to find milk with no problems. I met with a few different women, and had my freezer fully stocked in the event that something should go wrong and I wouldn't be able to nurse her myself. Fortunately, that wasn't the case. But, starting her on donor milk was the best thing that I have ever done for her. She immediately went from the 3rd percentile in height/weight, all the way up to the 85th. Her immune system was much better. Instead of being ill 3 weeks out of every month, she was ill once. She faced the possibility of another blood transfusion while ill. I gave her more donor milk, and her numbers shot up immensely. So much so, that she didn't need the transfusion. She has never been healthier since giving her donor milk.

To this day, we are still using donor milk. I plan to continue until she is at least 2 years old. I do still nurse her as well. We go through about 8-12 oz of donor milk a day. Like I said earlier, I had posted on Facebook that I was in need of more, and for my family and friends to please let me know if they know someone who is looking to donate some. While I was out with Gianna at Walmart filling AJ's new prescription for his ADHD, my phone buzzed. When I looked at it, I saw that it was a FB message. I brushed it off because I was busy, and I could wait until I got home to deal with Facebook. But something about the first few lines that showed up in the preview really bothered me. After a few minutes, I couldn't take it any longer, so I opened it. This is what it said:


A few things didn't sit right with me about this message. First off, my daughter is only 21 months old. She's not even two yet. So, where she came up with three is lost to me. Second, she is NOT underweight by any means at all. She is 26 lbs. The WHO growth chart puts her in the 75th percentile. Again, she is not underweight. Third, her baby isn't that much younger than Gianna, from what a friend of mine told me. This friend knows her personally, as they used to be friends. Fourth, I'm not sure where she gets the idea that my baby doesn't need it. Pediasure will not help her immune system. It won't help her numbers to remain at a healthy level.  And last, she blocked me IMMEDIATELY after sending this, so I couldn't even reply back to her. 

I'm not sure why she thought it was okay to message that to me? I am a mother of a child with a blood disorder. I am doing everything that I can to ensure my daughter is healthy. I don't take milk out from underneath other babies. As a matter of fact, I informed this mother of 2 other moms who had milk to donate and gave her their contact information so that her daughter would have milk. All I am is a mother who is doing her best to keep her child healthy. Not selfish by any means. She may have tried to shame me, and guilt trip me, but I will not stand for it. 

For the time being, I am still on the hunt for milk. I'm not having much luck locally, though. I did have a mom willing to pump and ship to me, but we can't afford the shipping costs right now. If you happen to know of anyone who has milk they're looking to donate, please point them my way! Maybe one of them are close enough that we could work something out. 

Saturday, May 18, 2013

You're such a retard!

Now that I have your attention ...

Imagine this. You're hanging out with your friends. There's at least 4 of you. You decide to try to do some new trick. Epic fail. You fall flat on your face. Your friends crack up hysterically, because let's face it, when it happens to someone else, it's pretty funny. Then one says "You really thought you could do that?! You're such a retard!!"

Imagine this as well. You're reading the new dress code at your local school. What?! Only blue jeans are allowed? No shorts? Not even in summer?! That is such a retarded rule. Who ever came up with that is retarded.

Now, imagine that you said all that out loud, next to a group of parents who have special needs kids. Or what if you said that right in front of those special needs kids? Loud enough for them to hear. Do you have any idea just how offensive that is?

Let's get something straight. I have no problem with it being used properly. Some people are mentally retarded. Children's pajamas are flame retardant. Some things have been proven to retard your growth. Those are all acceptable ways to use that word. Calling someone retarded because they did something stupid? Not acceptable. Using that term to describe something you don't believe is right? Not acceptable. Retard does NOT mean stupid. Stupid means stupid. Unfair means unfair.

My son has some learning disabilities. Stupid, he is not. He is many things. He is

                                                                  a boxer:

                                                            a decorator:

a member of the SWAT team:

and a storyteller:
Most importantly, he is Anthony. My son. A wise friend once told me that a child's disabilities are a part of them. They don't define him or her. 

Speaking of said friend. This is her daughter Emily. She has Down syndrome. She is not "that downs baby". She is not stupid. She is
a gamer (a pretty chatty one, too!):

a mess maker.

a Beauty Queen.

your typically happy-go-lucky toddler.

Most importantly, she is Emily. A BEAUTIFUL 6 year old girl, who happens to have a little something extra.


Another friend of mine has an almost 4 year old daughter. She has SPD as well. A more severe case than my son has. Krista's speech is also delayed. It is sometimes hard to understand her. She is in OT for her speech and sensory issues. Stupid? Definitely not. She is

a water baby:

a mud-pie baker:

a painter:

a ham for the camera:

But most importantly, she is Krista. A 3 year old whose 4th birthday is being celebrated in a few days. My son's best friend.




If you happened to look around before you spoke, and saw them, would you still proceed to call your friend a "retard" for doing something stupid? Or would you not care? Would you even understand just how hurtful that would be, not only to our children, but to us as parents? Our children are not stupid. They are very bright. They may not show you just how intelligent they are, but we see things every day that we're told they would never do. Emily's mom can attest to just how true that is. 

Emily's mom also said "Why do we need to use labels at all? Labels are for jars and my daughter is not a jar. The R word is hateful as is any word that deems my child somehow "different" than anyone else. Her name is Emily. She has Down syndrome. Call her Emily and she will answer."

Won't you take the pledge with us?