Friday, April 5, 2013

AJs Outburst and some updates

Let's back it up a few days ... April First. Yes, we all know it as April Fool's. My kids got me, and they got me GOOD. Sofia and AJ had been playing WONDERFULLY all day together. They enjoy sitting in the recliner together, tho it's not a big chair. Every time Sofia is sitting there, AJ will ask if he can sit next to her. She happily says yes, and scootches over. Same thing when AJ is sitting there first. I'm not sure why, but it's just something they've always done.

On April First, I thought "Wow! Look how great they're all getting along! This is fantastic!" I was so happy! Even Gianna was being nice and sharing her toys with them. A few minutes later, I hear AJ and Sofia starting to argue. Oh boy. I am not one to step in when they are arguing. When they come running to me, "MOOOOMMMMMM!! S/He did this .... ", I always tell them that I don't want to hear it. No tattling, no snitching, none of that. Work it out yourselves. And for the most part, they do. They argue, they yell, but then they come to an agreement. May not be an ideal agreement, but it worked for them.

On April First, my kids played the ultimate prank on me. They started fighting. Not just arguing. PHYSICAL fighting. Unfortunately, I can't place the video in the blog, but they were arguing about the chair. Sofia got up to put her socks in her room. At that point, AJ apparently decided to take over the entire chair so that he could play with his toys. Chairs are for sitting, not playing. I did not know he was playing with his toys. I thought he just wanted a turn to sit on the chair alone. I let them go at it, thinking Sofia would do what she usually does "FINE! I'm going in my room!" Boy was I wrong.

Next thing I hear, Sofia is screaming at the top of her lungs "STOP!! OWWW!!!" and she said something about biting. I'm still not exactly sure what it was that she said, but she lunged off the chair, and ran to me. She had tears streaming down her face. She took a minute to calm down, then was able to talk to me to tell me what he did. Apparently, AJ had bit her, and then scratched her hand. I had already told them when they first started arguing that they were not to get physical. They can argue, but they need to work it out without hitting or hurting each other. Sofia kept her hands to herself. AJ, obviously, did not.

I sent Sofia upstairs to wash her hand because drew blood, and she was bleeding quite a bit. While she was upstairs, I took the time to talk to AJ. Okay, I yelled at him. I yelled that we do NOT hit. It was NOT okay for him to hurt her, or anyone. That was when I found out he had the toys on the chair. I reminded him that toys do not belong on the furniture. You want to play? Go in the playroom. That's why we have it. Or go to your room. Either way. But don't play on something that someone wants to sit on. At that point, I sent him to his room, and called his father. He then called his mother and asked her to take him for the night. Clearly, those two needed to be separated, and I needed to calm down and regroup without him around to have another tantrum or become more violent.

On his way up to his room, he started stomping up the stairs and screaming that he hates us all. "I HATE THIS STUPID FAMILY! THIS IS THE WORST FAMILY EVER!! I'M RUNNING AWAY AND NEVER COMING BACK!" (For the record, he didn't attempt to run away.) He started throwing toys around, destroying his room, and I do believe he was hitting his head on the wall. He says he didn't, but he had a pretty big red mark on his forehead when I went up to check on him. He did fall asleep while he was up there, since I refused to respond to his outbursts. I let him sleep for a bit while I made dinner and talked to Sofia. We talked about how she could have easily gotten up off the chair and came and sat on the couch with me. She knows AJ has issues. Not that it's an excuse, but she knows that he can't help himself 100% of the time. She also knows that how he behaves is directly related to how she treats him. She is an instigator.

So, April Fool's to me. This is the damage AJ did to Sofia. I took these pictures the next day.
The first pic is the scratch on her hand. The middle is a scratch from his tooth scraping her. The last is where he punched her three times.

While he was in his room, I did call the Crisis Center. Unfortunately, the woman I spoke to was of NO help at all. She kept insisting that there was nothing they could do because of his age. She told me I could bring him in for an eval, but she can't guarantee anything, and we would likely just be sent home. My van is overheating, and the hospital I'd have to take him to is about 20 minutes away. My van would have overheated, and we would have never made it back home. That was not a risk I'd be able to take. Which is why we made the decision to see if my MIL would take him.

He did have another therapist/nurse practitioner visit today. Since I had the video on my phone, I showed his therapist. She spoke to him a bit about it. We talked about his punishment. We talked about a plan for him. I'm really not seeing any progress being made with her. It's still mainly her focused on me, asking random questions, doing paperwork, talking about his punishments, his behaviors, etc. The visit with the NP went much better. At the last appointment, we discussed medications that he was on, and she put him on Risperidone. Only .25mg to start off with. This time, she upped it. He is to take one tablet in the morning, and one in the evening. After a week of that, he will take one in the morning, and 2 in the evening. Hopefully we will see a change with this increase. If not, I am seriously going to consider asking them to hospitalize him until they can find the proper dosing and medication to help him.

On a positive note, Easter went well! The kids didn't get a lot of candy or toys, but they did enjoy what they got.

A picture of AJ from today:
He is in the Harmony Defender 360. Still harnessed at 6 years old and 45 lbs.

So, that's it for updates for today. I am exhausted. Sofia and Gianna are now sharing a room. This is the second night, and they are both fast asleep. The first night was rough, and Gianna fought sleep for over 2 hours. Today, she whined and cried just a little bit, but it only took half an hour. I am hoping I can just lay her down tomorrow night, and she'll go right to sleep. In the meantime, I will enjoy watching Sofia be an amazing big sister to Gianna. Last night, she read 4 books to her in hopes that she would settle and go to sleep. One being The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein. I love my girls!!

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