Thursday, October 11, 2012


My husband does tattoos as a hobby. It's mainly on himself, myself, or family that he does these tattoos on. Occasionally a friend will want one, and that's when he makes money off of them. $30 here, $50 there. Nothing significant by any means. This is where this post comes into play.

The other day, he had his stepsister and brother over. His ss wanted a tattoo of her bf's name and their anniversary on her wrist. While she was waiting for Anthony to get set up, her and I were making something to eat for her boys. As she opened the freezer to see what we had, she noticed my massive milk supply in there. She asked when and how I was able to pump that much milk. I stated that it wasn't mine. I use donor milk. The look on her face was of nothing but sheer disgust. I understand most people are not comfortable with it. I wasn't at first, either. But when my baby needed something to eat, and I couldn't provide it for her, what else was I to do? I have tried formula, and she refuses it. 

But that's not what irritated me. What really got me going was the fact that she had the audacity to say "You're still giving her titty milk??" with just this look on her face. It made me question myself for a brief moment. Then, I stopped the doubts, and informed her that the WHO recommended nursing until at least age 2. I let her know that G will let me know when she is done. She asked if I was still nursing her myself, and I said yes. There came the look again. 

Next thing she noticed was my corner of cloth diapers and cloth wipes. Again with the look. She turns to me and says "Let me guess, G sleeps in your bed, too?". Yep, she sure does. At that point, she says "You've changed so much. I don't know if I like it or not."

Woah ... wait a minute. You don't know if you like it?? When did you become such a significant role in my life to make any kind of judgement on me? Years ago, there was a problem between you and I, and you threatened me while I was pregnant with my son. But now I'm supposed to change my life back to the way YOU liked it? No thanks.

How much have I really changed? Let's see:
Baby #1- I was 18 years old. Breastfed for 3 months. Stopped because I didn't know I had a low-supply problem, and could work through it. Fed Sofia Similac, started solids at 3 months old, used any brand of diapers and wipes I could get my hands on (minus Huggies- worst. diapers. EVER.), did CIO, slept in her own crib in my room, put her down at every opportunity, vax'd on time, forward faced at 1 year old. Also, everything was brand new- clothes, toys, you name it.
Baby #2- I was 22 years old. Breastfed for 6 weeks. Stopped because he was sensitive to something I ate, and I didn't know about eliminating things from my diet. Fed AJ Enfamil, Similac, then Good Start Soy, started solids at 6 months, used Luvs diapers and Whitecloud wipes, did CIO, slept in his own crib in his own room, held him more often as he was a clingy/needy baby, circ'd, vax'd on time, forward facing at 1 year old. Most things were brand new- most clothes, most toys, but still had quite a bit of used things.
Baby #3- I was 26 years old. Breastfed for 13 months (and counting). We did supplement early on with formula, but was able to stop by 4 months old. Started solids at 5 months, then stopped until she was closer to 8 months. Pampers from birth until 6 months, cloth diapers since then. Whitecloud wipes when out, cloth wipes at home. No CIO. Starts the night in her Pack and Play, finishes in my bed. Held often, either in my arms, or in my Boba 3G (which I LOVE, by the way!!). Semi-delayed vax (1 or 2 at a time). Still rear facing in her infant seat. Almost everything this child owns was given to us, or bought used, except for a few things.

Okay, maybe I have changed quite a bit. But I don't think it's a bad change. I think I've changed for the better. Now that we have three kids to care for, it's getting pretty expensive. By using cloth diapers/wipes, we're saving quite a bit. By accepting used things, we're saving even more. By breastfeeding, I'm not paying for expensive formula. I'm still me. I still have my attitude. I still discipline my kids. I still act the same. It's just the little things. As a parent, yes, I've grown. I've grown leaps and bounds, and have figured out what works for us and doesn't. I'm more confident in my choices, and I refuse to let someone so insignificant try to tell me how I should parent my kids. And when my husband is standing behind me 100% in my choices, it makes it that much easier.

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