Yep, it's official

My car is a POS. I mean, we knew this - it's a 2004 Dodge Neon SXT. It wasn't built to last, unfortunately. It served me well. My dad bought it for me, brand new, in November of 2004 so I've had it for over 8 years. I've taken countless trips to Maine to visit my mother when she was alive. Many, many trips to NYC to visit Anthony's family. Multiple trips to Syracuse for Gianna's appointments. But now, we're out of luck. We don't have the money to purchase another car right away. We have to wait until income tax money comes. But that leaves us with another dilemma.

My dad called this AM to let me know what the guys said at the shop. Apparently, my car burnt through the brand new spark plugs that were just put in recently. I'm doing all I can to not cry some more, so I wasn't really listening to what else he said was wrong. Basically, the car is ready for me to pick up, but it's not driveable. I mean, we can drive it here, and likely put it on the correct side of the street every night, but we can't take it to the grocery store when we feel like getting some snacks. We can't take it to the mall just because we want to get out of the house. We can't drive to McDs when we're too tired to cook. We should be able to use it for Anthony to get to work and back each day, but he certainly can't come home for lunch. Hell, he may not even be able to drive it to work. I'm not entirely sure. All I know is that I shouldn't drive it, period. Chances are, if I go anywhere, I'll have the kids with me. And if the car breaks down, then I'll have to walk home with all the kids. Not. Going. To. Happen.

The van I want is just under $3,000. It's nothing fancy, but it runs. It's reliable. Might not be good enough to take it to NYC as often as we like to go, but that's fine by me. I just need something that is going to take all of us where we need to go. Comfortably, and safely. This also means that in a van, Sofia can be back in her booster. There is no room in my Neon for all 3 kids to be in seats. Sofia is *technically* okay without the booster, but I am much more comfortable with her in one. It also means that I can put Gianna in her new seat. I bought it a while ago (okay, almost a whole year ago) and we've only used it a handful of times. She still fits in her infant seat, so we use that. It's a lot easier to just take the whole seat out of the car when (and if) she falls asleep. No unbuckling, waking the sleeping baby. Just lift and go. I'm definitely going to miss that in a car seat. It's okay though. I'm still super stoked to use it!

In the meantime, I have to deal with not having a car. Now I need to find a ride appointments, to the grocery store, to anywhere. Totally sucks, but I went years without a car before. I'll live. Hopefully. It is winter, after all. I'm still taking donations to help me get the van, sooner!!